do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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