so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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