Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Randomize
