we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
NoShamevember. You game?
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize