I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
