All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
we're so committed to being not committed
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
