found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
