There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
