As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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