its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
