Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
