talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
