I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize