She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize