I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
