All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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