fuck your aforementioned shoe
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
