32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You know, be my cock's hype man.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
