you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
