He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
