I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
There's always time for handjobs
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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