I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
home. puking in laundry basket.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
