I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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