OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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