Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
