D3 body, D1 cock
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize