Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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