Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
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