i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
