remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
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