piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Randomize
