Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Randomize
