Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I cut my penus on the lid.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
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