Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
