i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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