I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
