Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
