butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
