Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
