The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
