So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
