it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
