The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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