halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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