She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
COCAINE IS GR8
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Randomize
