Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
false alarm. still invincible.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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