what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
