Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
