So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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