I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
