I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
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